Or not. As the case may be.
I have mentioned recently that I have been hankering for pumpkin ravioli. Like a deep, primal, need for it. With sage butter. Holy hell am I craving it.
Mother found what looked like a simple/easy recipe on line and a few days ago I made a trip to the grocery store for the ingredients. I kept the can of pumpkin on the kitchen counter all week and every time I saw it I got giddy with the knowledge that Saturday, today, I would be making something fabulous. I would be in charge of my ravioli destiny!
So this morning I printed off the recipe and got to work. I put on my favorite navy striped apron and gathered the ingredients. Then I had a great thought- I would photograph the experience and then share it with you guys. It would be like we were spending the time together cooking and having fun.
The first steps were easy and before long I was filled with the smugness of a gourmet chef. Check me out making ravioli dough! Check me out making filling! Check me out rolling the dough out.
And then it happened. All of a sudden the recipe became too complicated for me. I had to read and reread the directions. Divide the dough, um and then what? Measure what? Huh? Moisten? What?
I was lost and then I was crushed. I wanted to DO this. Make my own happiness. I was on a roll and then things got complicated and I wanted to stop, toss everything down the sink and quit.
Oh, so the ravioli was now an analogy for my life when things didn’t go my way.
Damn life lessons.
So I dusted some flour back onto my hands and tossed the recipe (well I put it aside) and I tried to continue in a logical “this is how you make ravioli” way. And it was so relaxing to just do it my way. No stress no anxiety over being perfect. Until I had all of the raviolis lined up on the paper towel and a bowl still full of filling. I mean clearly I had not followed the recipe and it was not going to turn out right. But it might.
They are boiling now. Well, exploding in a boil might be a better term. But at least I can always say that I have made ravioli. Um, yeah. There’s that.